Archive for General
If You Ain’t Happy Honey, It’s Just “Stuff” . . .
Posted by: | CommentsI remember the “stuff” lecture from the old black woman in Savannah who used to cook and clean for a friend of mine. It seems like every time I was there, old Frederica – we called her “Freddie” – would throw out some pearl of wisdom based on her long and hard life that I now consider priceless.
Freddie was always smiling. She took life with a grain of salt and a pinch of mustard, then added her own sweet flavoring to shake and bake her experiences. And we loved her for it. Whenever there was a pressing problem, crisis, tragedy or upset, she would usually wave her hand in the air as if to wipe it away.
“They ain’t no reason to get your drawers in a wad honey,” she advised,
“Things has a way a comin’ and goin’ . . .”
And she was right. Just like a heavy fog settling in over our brains, “stuff” has a way of confusing us, upsetting us, confounding us, and hypnotizing us to believe its actually real. But its usually not.
“Stuff” – as I define it – is a type of negative energy, flotsam, jetsam or what the Ghostbusters called “etheric slime” that comes along and sticks to our brains and nervous systems. These hidden decisions are easily able to spread and multiply, primarily because our ego associates these functions as “me,” “mine,” or “ours.” Because of the “mine” blinders, we fail to see this as some kind of invading energy or force that may or may not have anything to do with us!
“Stuff” may have come by simply walking into a room after a big fight, for example, and you feel “weird” or “angry.” It may also have been directed at us consciously or subconsciously from other people when their emotional conflicts, ancestral beliefs, or cultural obsessions spill over.
“Memes” or mind viruses – are like this, but the meme is primarily a conscious factor that can be traced back to some statement or construct. For example, You may have heard some catchy jingle, a particularly political point of view, or an ad about “the starving children” that triggers your emotions. These are all advertising gimmicks that harness the power of the emotions to make you act.
Grandma's Stuff. Ancestral Keepsake?
“Stuff,” on the other hand, is a deeper, more universal manifestation of memes. It is usually not directed at you per se, but exists on its own – like a Venus flytrap waiting for its victim – the fly – to arrive. Once you experience these archetypal traps you’re gone, i,e., caught in a web of emotion that comes over you like waves on the beach. You are snared.
As soon as you become aware of them, the fears of your dead ancestors, the anger and resentment of a total stranger, or the horror and blank stares from victims of terrorism grab you and don’t let go. Most of the time this Stuff happens by subconscious transference, but even if you know what is happening, it still gets you!
So long as you consider these are YOUR thoughts and YOUR feelings, you will hold on to them with conviction and reverence. I remember this happened for years after my father died. I was gripped in a type of self-righteous anger that used to be his trademark expression.
It took me YEARS to finally come to grips with this malaise based on some misguided (and subconscious) decision to honor him. I finally released it, but the toll it took on my financial and personal life during those years was staggering.
There is a way out of the stuff. My wife and I do it daily, and you can too: discover the source of your emotional trigger, acknowledge it, sometimes get permission from it, then let it go. It takes practice, but hey! What else do you have to do??
Just don’t get your drawers in a wad.
George Carlin on Aging
Posted by: | CommentsComedian and social commentator George Carlin had much to say about everything, but what I enjoyed most were his views on aging. Since this kind of affects us all, I thought I’d reprint it here for those who have been in a dark cave over the past year and have not received the e-mailed version of this floating around . . .
As a side note, I just met with my first cousin Mike who informs me he will soon ‘make it to 60.’ While this is not significant in and of itself, and I knew his mom – Aunt Hilda – will be 90 in April, it suddenly hit me that I’m only 2 years away from this sixty milestone myself.
Here’s what George had to say. Take notes and pass it on:
George Carlin’s Views on Aging
Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we’re kids? If you’re less than 10 years old, you’re so excited about aging that you think in fractions.
‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m four and a half!’ You’re never thirty-six and a half. You’re four and a half, going on five! That’s the key.
You get into your teens, now they can’t hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.
‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m gonna be 16!’ You could be 13, but hey, you’re gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life! You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony. YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!
But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There’s no fun now, you’re Just a sour-dumpling. What’s wrong? What’s changed?
You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you’re PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it’s all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50, and your dreams are gone….
But! Wait!! ! You MAKE it to 60. You didn’t think you would!
So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50, and make it to 60.
You’ve built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that, it’s a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!
You get into your 80’s, and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn’t end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; ‘I Was JUST 92.’
Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. ‘I’m 100 and a half!’ May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!
HOW TO STAY YOUNG
- Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay them.
- Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
- Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever, even ham radio. Never let the brain idle. ‘An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.’ And the devil’s family name is Alzheimer’s.
- Enjoy the simple things.
- Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
- The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves Be ALIVE while you are alive.
- Surround yourself with what you love, whether it’s family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.
- Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
- Don’t take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
- Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.
AND, ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. Life’s journey is not to Arrive at the grave safely In a well preserved body, But rather to skid in sideways, Totally used up and worn out, shouting ‘…man, what a ride!’
Everyone Has Their ‘Zorba’ Moments
Posted by: | Comments“Teach me to dance.”
So goes the line by the character Basil in Zorba the Greek after his friend Zorba has disastrously ordered a third log to shoot down their already-compromised zip line, publicly destroying what was left of the logging business both men had spent months creating.
And so it goes . . . I’m reminded of this moment while getting ready to attend a closing to sell our former residence near Decatur, Georgia. This house – putting it mildly – was a disaster (and all my doing). We bought it in 2001 for $105K, spent over $130K fixing it up over the years, lived in it from 2006-2008 because we couldn’t sell it.
Then the Great Recession hit and we are lucky to let it go for $195K, minus all the closing costs, realtor commissions, et cetera, et cetera . . . This is in addition to the fact that we also bought and sold several other properties over the past decade, only one of which could be considered a financial success!
So, more than $50,000 and years of time – up in smoke. Today, Brigitte and I celebrate our ‘Zorba Moment.’ Wisdom comes at a price. We paid ours.
And so we dance. You can too:
First Logical Soul Meetup Group!
Posted by: | CommentsA new Meetup Group called “The Logical Soul for Entrepreneurs” is being formed in the Atlanta area, and will begin on Wednesday, February 10, 2010 for those wishing to make “miracle breakthroughs” in their business.
Dr. Michael Craig will be the facilitator, and claims that the biggest obstacle to success is the internal “No’s” we constantly get when trying to accomplish something. He will demonstrate how the simple technique of the Logical Soul (tm) can be used by anyone to gain more confidence by changing the hidden decisions to fail. He will focus on two candidates each week who want to eliminate procrastination, self-sabotage, and other blocks to their success.
Norcross Community Center
This group presentation will be held monthly, on the second Wednesday of every month, from 7:30 to 9 pm at the Norcross Community Center, Room #2, near downtown Norcross, at 10 College Street, Norcross, GA 30071. The meeting room is part of the historic Norcross Methodist Church building (see picture), built in 1875 and recently subject to a complete renovation.
There is a parking lot next to the church and meeting room building. Park and come in the side door on the ground floor. If you live in the Atlanta area, make plans to attend.
If you want more information on the meeting place, call Nathan Brown at (770) 448-2122. If you would like more details of the meeting, contact Dr. Craig at (770) 348-4672.
Mom Update: Overwhelming Support
Posted by: | CommentsSupport has been forthcoming so much lately, I just had to publicly say “Thanks” to all friends, family, the staff at Pigeon Forge Care & Rehab Center, and associates and mentors like Brenda Wade who offered to pray and light candles for the passing of my mother. Dr. Wade also kindly said ‘yes’ to my request to write the forward to The Logical Soul(tm)! (Thanks Doc!)
Prayers are also coming from far away. Thank you to our German family – Ushi & Conny & their families, and to my new Editor Vandana Chandra in India for his best wishes and support. Also thanks to Steve & Gillen who will no longer have us for New Year’s Eve, and other friends in Atlanta (Beate, Birgit, Don, Bruce & Susan and families, and many, many others) and n Savannah (Chuck & Melinda). True friends all.
Mom is not doing too well. Although her vitals are still strong, her overall condition has deteriorated rapidly since Christmas. Based on her final wishes, she has no feeding tube, and just lost the fluid IV since her veins are rejecting all attempts to re-insert it. If her heart stops, she has asked that no one resuscitate her.
Sister Page and I will keep an all-night vigil, but right now I’m here by myself with her. I’ll let you know when the inevitable happens . . .
Page, "Baboo" and Michael
Mom’s Condition: No Change
Posted by: | CommentsI’m writing this from a Denny’s Restaurant not far from my Mother’s nursing facility in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee. It is about 6:30 am. Unable to sleep since 4, I slipped out of the hotel room my wife Brigitte and I rented nearby and just drove all around the deserted streets.
As soon as the doors opened at 6, I went to check on her. So far there is little change. I’m relieved somewhat, but know its only a matter of time.
We arrived yesterday afternoon round 4:30 pm and settled into a hotel room nearby. I hadn’t planned to come back so soon – especially since this is the peak rental season (other than summer) in the Smokey Mountains. But my sister called to say “Baboo’s” (Momma Weatherly’s) condition had worsened and I wanted to be with the family.
Despite the long time watching our Mom’s condition deteriorate, my sister and I still mark her passing as another major turning point in our lives.
After breakfast, I’ll be back at my vigil. More later.
Memories of Mother
Posted by: | Comments
"Baboo" Weatherly
My mother is dying.
She’s been in a nursing home (Pigeon Forge Rehabilitation Center) for the past six months, and has taken a turn for the worst since Christmas. She has stopped eating and may not live to see the New Year.
Obviously I’m grieving over this eminent loss, and wanted to get out a few words about her before I might lose the urge to say anything . . .
Barbara Cannon Weatherly McWaters (a.k.a. “Baboo”) was born March 27, 1927 in Savannah, Georgia, and has lived a full life. She married my father Earl Weatherly (1921-1990), raised two wonderful kids, and found the time to become one of the premier artists in Savannah during the 1960’s and 70’s. She loved painting “hard edge” abstract painting,s but also did portraits to earn some extra cash. She was one of the original founding members of Gallery 209 on River Street in Savannah.
She married Roy McWaters (d. 2002) in 1993 and moved to Tennessee to be close to my sister Page and her two grandkids, Christopher and Patrick.
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I just wanted to share this with my followers and friends to ask for your prayers and thoughts. There is nothing more you need do. Thanks just for being there.
If my postings are missing, a little aimless, or sporadic over the next few days and weeks, you’ll know why.
Christmas Day (and Funny Jokes ‘n Stuff, Part 3)
Posted by: | CommentsMerry Christmas!!
For some Catholics, this is the time of rest, after the festivities of the previous week. For others – particularly Mexicans – the gifts won’t come until February!
It’s a happy day anyway, for most who experienced a Christian upbringing. This is a day of joy and goodwill towards your fellow man (even if you can’t stand them the other 364 days of the week).
In honor of Christmas Day (a.k.a., another excuse), I present “the rest of the best” public offerings by those whose lives somehow got entered into the “funny joke of the day” category:
Christmas Eve (and Funny Jokes ‘n Stuff, Part 2)
Posted by: | CommentsMerry Christmas Eve! My wife is German with Catholic upbringing, so I have to partake in the family “Christmas rituals” for THE most Holiest of Catholic Days – even though there is only 2 of us (and Mr. Pookey the cat). This means evening Mass, caroling, opening presents and generally acting out her childhood as best we can.
Growing up Southern Methodist, my Christmases were a little different. For one thing, we had to wait until Christmas Morning (not Christmas Eve) to open presents. Then, after the wild flurry of gift-wrapping all over the living room, we adjourned to the outdoors to compare Santa gifts with all the other neighbor kids. More on this tomorrow . . .
So, in honor of Christmas (a.k.a., anything for an excuse) here are the rest of my favorite funny publications. Enjoy!
