Dr. Michael Craig, Vol. 5, #20 – May 23, 2017
The Open Secret
Want to know how to read someone like a book? Watch. Ask questions. And really listen.
That’s right. It’s an open secret that – to read someone correctly – you only have to watch and listen. Then they will reveal things they never told anyone . . . even themselves! I discovered this after interviewing hundreds of guests on my radio program, as well as after doing sessions with thousands of people.
But listening – really listening – is a natural talent that has been trained right out of us.
I learned this the hard way as a child and adolescent growing up in Savannah, Georgia. I remember being a part of a family gathering where they were telling stories from the wartime and I noticed that Aunt Floozie (not her real name) was very fidgety and nervous. So, naturally, I spoke up in my innocence and said Aunt Floozie was really afraid of that topic.
First, a look of shock came over everyone, Aunt Floozy denied she was afraid of anything, and I was quietly ushered out of the room to “go play with the other kids!”
I never forgot how I disrupted the room, however. I didn’t mean to. Didn’t want to. I was only doing what I’d been told, i.e., “Always tell the truth.” Then I was confused when I didn’t get praise for doing what I was told.
It was after events like this that I finally came to realize that adults didn’t really mean what they said when it came to “the truth.” They only wanted the truth when it pertained to something I had done wrong. That’s it. All the “adult conversations” apparently were off limits to this requirement.
As I grew into my late teens, I became increasingly schizophrenic in trying to decide when the truth actually applied to who, what, when, or how much? I discovered this southern “politeness” thing meant that most subjects were off limits to discussion, and that I was expected to be polite, rather than truthful, i.e., “Go along to get along…”
But somehow “tomorrow” never came.
I Got Cured
After decades of soul searching, meditation, group therapies, self-discovery workshops and “working on myself,” I finally am at the place where I can see what that silly southern facade was all about, i.e., a bunch of dysfunctional people putting on a brave face simply because they knew of no other way to be!
Now my wife and I are committed to speaking the truth to each other and to others. I also found that, by telling the truth, I didn’t have to remember much (it turns out that lies have a way of coming out unless you tell more lies…)
I still, however, often rely on my inherited southern diplomacy to soften the blow when its a subject of deep importance to the listener. I can do this because I learned about “divine listening”…
You (or your Soul) already know the truth. But do you have the courage to actually look for it? Hear it? Then acknowledge or speak it? If you can do this – without anger, hate or revenge in your heart – congratulations. You will have a happier life.
To your success,