Vol. 4, #48 – December 5, 2016
We have a leaning Christmas tree. Thus begins the saga…
First things first. The Christmas Holidays mean that my wife Soma gets busy . . . and one of the major “busy items” on her list is the Christmas Tree setup.
I guess she got tired of my groaning and moaning every time I had to lug all that stuff out of the attic. Now she recruits help – usually in the form of our cleaning lady who apparently also finds it fun.
Its not fun for me. I’m a Scrooge, remember? (see last week’s Ezine).
Anyway, this year’s Tannenebaum was a bit droopy. And, of course, it is now the “man’s job” to fix this deplorable condition . . . especially since I didn’t help with the initial setup.
“It doesn’t look so bad to me” I propose, feeling rather festive. And lazy.
“It looks awful!” she says, “And besides, I’ve got my aunt coming to visit on the 14th.”
I notice her eyelids start to twitch – an indication that any form of tomfoolery is to be cut short immediately.
Suddenly I start feeling much older. So I reach down inside to invoke the last remnants of my inner child…
“She might like it this way!” I counter, realizing immediately this only adds gasoline to the fire.
So, soon after the anticipated barrage of scowls and “how could you’s,” I meekly agree to do the thing.
With one last boyish effort, I grab a stick, turn it into my magic wand, and loudly proclaim “Leaning tree… begone!!” I really don’t care if the tree straightens up, or disappears altogether. Either outcome would be fine with me.
Nothing happens. Soma stomps off with an echoing harrumph!
The (Small) Silver Lining
I will eventually take out my tools and re-adjust the (blessed) thing. For now, however, I simply enjoy NOT doing it . . . for as long as I can.
Hey – it’s a guy thing.